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Posted on Jul 9, 2014 in Blogging, Dear Diary | 13 comments

Reset, Refocus, Revitalize

O HAI THERE.

Whaddya know, I still have a blog. Guess I kind of forgot about it in all the post-Yelper Party mayhem, eh? Well, if there is only one person reading this, then I definitely only have myself to blame for that (but thank you to that one person *coughmomcough* for sticking with me!).

I just popped in to say that I know I’ve been a bad, bad blogger recently, but I actually have some fun news to share. See, I think that the time away from the pressures of feeling bad about not blogging (or writing) has given me the break that I needed to recharge my batteries. Work craziness has died down somewhat and I’m returning to a state of normalcy, which means I’m actually itching to get back in the saddle, as it were!

Of course, with the break from blogging and the mental reset also came a few realizations (that tie in pretty well with the content of my last post). See, I think that those of you who suggested I consider rebranding and refocusing this here blog are right! I’ve spent almost four (!!) amazing years with Honey, I Shrunk the Gretchen! and I’ve grown up and I’ve lost weight and I’ve learned more about myself than I thought I ever would, but, as you have no doubt noticed, my priorities have definitely changed.

Weight loss itself hasn’t been a priority for me in quite a while — at least not in the same way that it once was. And I’m actually pretty okay with that. I’m actually pretty okay with myself right now… for like, the first time ever, hahahaha. So I’d like this blog to be a bit more reflective of that. Of my new perspective, of my new goals (or my lack of goals), of the fact that I’m a different gal than I was 4 years ago. So I’ll be rebranding this blog to be representative of exactly that!

Nothing has been created just yet, but I just wanted to take this time to update you on what’s going on, and to let you know that I think there are some fun things on the horizon. So stay tuned (hey, if you’ve stuck with me this long, what’s a little while longer, eh?) and, as always, feel free to let me know if you think I’m making a giant mistake… though you know I’m just gonna do it anyway. ;)

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Posted on May 15, 2014 in Dear Diary, Weight Loss | 19 comments

The Missing Ingredient

So, as evidenced by the increasing infrequency of my posting, I guess you can probably imagine that work has gotten muy loco once again, and this poor, neglected blog is suffering the consequences. Well, there is good news and bad news that comes out of this fact, the bad news being that, of course, my posting has gone out the window… as have my *ahem* weigh-ins. (Oops.)

BUT. The good news is that the thing that I’m working on is a flippin’ huge, rocktastic, amaaaaahzing party that Y-O-U are invited to attend!

Yelp Gets Lucky

Yelp Gets Lucky is taking place on Friday, June 13th from 8 – 10 PM (or 7 PM if you’re part of the Yelp Elite Squad) and it’s going to be a seriously good time. We’re talking tons of noms, draaaaanks, and entertainment, all courtesy of amazing local businesses!

Best of all? It’s 100% TOTALLY COMPLETELY FREE to attend! All you gotta do is RSVP on Yelp. That’s it. For serious. So local readers, you have no excuse not to come out and play, okay?!

Aaaaanyway, now that that shameless plug is out of the way, let’s get back to me making pitiful excuses for why I haven’t been blogging. I mean, wait. What?

Okay, so here’s the real deal. (Buckle in, this is gonna be a long ride, folks.) I’ve been thinking a lot lately about this blog and where I’m going with it. You know, thinking about where I was in my life when I wrote that first post three and half years ago, and where I am now. Thinking about the goals I’ve achieved, the ones that I’ve failed at, the ones that I first achieved and THEN failed at maintaining afterwards… and how with the onset of this dream job and so many things in my life falling into place, maintaining this blog has lately felt more like a burden than a joy.

I know, I know, that sounds bad, and maybe it actually reads harsher than I really mean it to, but, hmm. How do I say it… I guess I’ve been kind of tiptoeing around the fact that I’m just not as passionate about blogging as I used to be. And I’ve been blaming it on being busy or being distracted or whatever, but I think we all know that it’s not really about not having the time to do it.

I mean, here’s the story of this blog in a nutshell: I was fat and unhappy, so I lost a buncha weight. And it was awesome! Aaaand then I gained a whole bunch of weight back. And that was not so awesome (especially to admit… publicly… on the interwebs) but, unlike before, I was fat and happy. Not happy about being fat, but you know what I mean. But, hey, I write a weight loss blog. So I knew that eventually I needed to own up to regaining the weight, and that I also needed to re-lose it. I had it in my mind that if I did it once, I could do it again just as long as I did all the same things I did the first time around. So that’s what I set out to do.

And sure, it worked for a while, because just paying attention to myself and what I was eating again was enough to help me shed those first 10, 15 pounds again. But then… I dunno. My drive just kinda — poof! — disappeared. And I couldn’t really figure out why. After all, I was doing all the same things I did the first time. Counting my calories, exercising (well, kinda…), cleaning my diet back up. And it was working! I was losing weight again. And yet… something was still missing.

I just haven’t been able to muster up the same enthusiasm towards my weight loss that I had the first time around. Maybe it’s because I’ve taken so many steps backwards that the fact that I’m finally moving forward again isn’t really a big deal. Because I’m still so far from where I once was. So, you know, celebrating a loss that I had already lost but subsequently regained doesn’t really seem like an appropriate thing to celebrate anymore. There’s too much guilt and shame involved now.

Beyond that, though, I think part of the reason why doing all the same things and following the same path doesn’t feel quite right anymore is because while all those things might be the same, I’m not. I’m pretty damn different now than I was three and a half years ago (um, thank GOODNESS, right?). Pretty much everything in my life has changed since then — my job (VIVA LA YELP!), my relationship (I think I’ll keep him), even my family (hello, Auntie Gretchen!). In fact, the only thing that hasn’t really changed is this pervasive obsession I continue to have with losing weight and, while we’re being honest I’ll just say it, being thin.

Let’s just face facts: While I talked a LOT about how, really, this blog is about getting healthy, and, really, it’s about working through my food issues, and, really, it’s about loving myself, you wanna know what it’s REALLY been about? Losing weight. I mean, it’s right there in the title. And I feel like in having that focus right from the start, I was always in the mindset that there was something about me that needed to change. That needed to be fixed. And that one basic thought right there, despite all my best efforts and a lot of denial, led the way for a lifetime of doubt and self-loathing to settle in under every victorious blog post, every one of my successes.

I mean, heck, even when I did lose 60 pounds and felt happy and whole and looked rockin’ in tapered denim, I still wasn’t satisfied. I wanted to continue to “fix” myself, to lose more, to be skinnier… and I’m pretty sure that lack of contentment is probably a key factor in why I started to regain weight in the first place.

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So yes, I obviously would love to get back to that place, that weight, how I felt at that time. But I don’t want to get there by spouting positivity on this blog but secretly wishing I could chop off the rolls on my stomach in private. The truth of the matter is that I’ve spent far too much of my life punishing myself for my body, being mad at myself for lacking the self-control to be thin, hatefully comparing myself to other women.

Now, let’s just hit the “pause” button for a hot sec, because I want to clarify that this post is in no way a declaration that I’m going to stop blogging. I’m obviously waaaaay too egomaniacal to ever do that. Please. But I am starting to reevaluate what it is that I’m looking to get out of this and put into this blog. Because I don’t think my real goal is just to lose weight any more. Or, at least, I don’t think I want it to be.

Maybe I’m finally getting to a place where I truly do want to work towards being able to fully accept and love my body as-is. No improvements needed. And I promise, I’m not trying to use this as an excuse to be lazy and eat whatever I want and be unhealthy. This is all about trying to implement a shift in my perspective, and I think it’s time for me to take a break from this total fixation I have on my weight, my size, and my body in general. Or at least, to TRY to take a break from it.

And you know, while I’m working on the full mental overhaul that I’m sure will be required to get me to see things just a little differently (I tell ya, the media industry really has done a number on me), I’ll continue to eat healthily (for the most part, as I do now) and go to the gym (for the occasional part, at least) and we’ll see where that gets me for the next little while.

Aaaaand since this post has LONG since passed the “eyes glazing over” stage right into TL;DR territory, I’ll go ahead and stop myself here. Let’s see how this attempt at a shiny new perspective goes, shall we?

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Posted on May 1, 2014 in Dear Diary | 6 comments

Lingual Braces: Four Months In

Hi folks!

So I figured it might be interesting for those of you who are in any way, shape, or form invested in the state of my teeth (so… really just interesting for me, then) to get a little update on how the whole lingual braces thing is going! Fair warning, you’re about to see lots of up-close-and-personal photos of my mug, haha.

For reference’s sake, feel free to click back for a refresher on how I was feeling during Week 1 (hint: it wasn’t good) and Weeks 2 & 3 (MUCH better).


January 28, 2014, the day I got my braces


March 27, 2014

I had my 3rd adjustment last week, and I definitely feel as though I’m seeing a serious difference in my teeth. The right side of my upper teeth in particular seem almost completely straight to me, which is awesome. The slight overlap between my two front teeth is also straightened out, though my left front tooth still protrudes juuuuuust slightly.


Day 1 vs. today! (Whitening will come later, hahaha!)

The left side of my teeth have also improved, but since that was much worse to begin with, it’s still got a bit of a ways to go. The difference between my left canine and the tooth next to it (what I used to UNaffectionately refer to as my shadow tooth, since if the light hit me wrong I sometimes looked toothless ahahahhha) is much diminished, though still not straight.

As for the extreme tongue discomfort that I experienced in the beginning, it’s pretty much a non-issue at this point. I don’t use wax anymore, and it doesn’t hurt at all. At my adjustment last week, they clipped the wire that was extending past my actual brackets, which has been causing a smidge of annoyance because my tongue is getting used to the feeling of the clipped end of the wire now, but it’ll be good in the long run because I was getting food stuck on the wire ALL the time.

Adjustments are still a huge pain — literally — because I pretty much can’t eat anything solid for the two days following, but otherwise I’m definitely getting used to that too. Once the pain subsides, I’ve found that I can eat most things, though I still follow common sense about what to try my luck on. As long as I don’t mind thoroughly brushing my teeth afterwards, I’ve even found I can eat corn on the cob and stuff like that!

Thankfully, my lisp also pretty much disappeared after the first couple of weeks (or, at least, that’s what people tell me). The lisping does seem to get temporarily worse for about a week following my adjustments, strangely. Maybe because my teeth are so sensitive and my whole mouth just feels a little weird? Meh. As long as it is just temporary, I’m cool with it.

So there you go! My four-month update on the lingual braces front. As far as I know, my predicted length of treatment is still less than a year in total, though I haven’t been told if there’s an exact amount of time left or not. Until then, guess I’ll just keep smiling!

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Posted on Apr 21, 2014 in Dear Diary, Food | 12 comments

A Frozen Birthday

I know that this update is woooooefully overdue, but hey, better late than never, right? My birthday weekend… week… let’s be honest I’m still celebrating… was absolutely wonderful, and a huge part of what made it oh-so-magical was, indeed, the Frozen-themed birthday party that I had!

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I’ll primarily let the photos do the talking, but as you will see, it was most definitely a good (and super delicious!) time.

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Do you wanna build a snowman?

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Hi, I’m Olaf and I like warm hugs!

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We are not so into the warm hugs.

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Well, okay, Harry’s not totally opposed.

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You can’t have a Frozen-themed party without a few touches of Spring. :)

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The spread!

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“I mean, it’s crazy, we finish each other’s–”
“–sandwiches.”
“That’s what I was gonna say!”

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“And maybe it’s the party talking, or the chocolate fondue…”

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These amaaaaazing, adorable, and totally, totally delicious miniature cakes (as well as the finger sammies!) were made by my friend Jessica (who I actually met thanks to this very blog! #fullcircle) They are insanely awesome flavors like “Blueberry Elderflower” and “Raspberry Lavender” — and I still have like three extra ones in my fridge, bwahahaha.

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Daxter singing along to “Let It Go” ;)

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Caketime!

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My friend Megan may or may not have also brought ACTUALLY frozen cake, hehe:

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SUGAR IS THE BEST.

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We also threw a little bit of Tangled into the mix and sent off a wish lantern at the end of the night! Warning to the wise, these things are a huge pain in the butt to light, haha.

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Also, FIRE IS TERRIFYING.

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Make a wish!

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Another wonderful way to usher in my latest turn around the sun! Any suggestions for next year’s theme? Right now I’m leaning towards a Pokemon theme, but that may be fairly heavily influenced by the fact that I attended AwesomeCon over the weekend here in DC, ahahaha.

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Posted on Apr 11, 2014 in Dear Diary | 9 comments

26 and Livin’ Large

Soooo, today is my twenty-sixth nameday/cakeday/birthday. Hip, hip, huzzah!

Those of you who have been long-time readers of this blog know that I’m kiiiiiiind of into my birthday.




To say the least.

And while 26 certainly has less pomp and circumstance attached to it than, say, my Quarter Quell did, I’m still pretty excited to usher in another faaabulous year.

After all, 25 has been pretty great to me! I started my dream job (I actually got the official offer letter ON my birthday last year — talk about a great present!), helped my beautiful niece usher in her very first birthday, and oh so much other great stuff in between. So here’s to another year of loving my job, spending time with my loved ones, AND rocking out this whole weight loss thing to boot, eh?

On the docket for this birthday weekend is:

Birthday brunch today with my brother Ben (how d’ya like that alliteration?)
Birthday dinner with Sean at an as-yet undisclosed location
My FROZEN-themed birthday party tomorrow (Let it goooo, let it goooo, you’re not 25 anymoooore…)
And a birthday dinner with my whole family on Sunday night!

Let the festivities commence!

See you never, 25. It’s been real.

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