Sponsored Post: The Coolest Tampon in the World

Gentlemen, I suggest you go ahead and X out of your browser now, because I cannot imagine a single way in which the following post will be either useful or relevant to you. Unless you’re interested purely in an academic sense, in which case, I suppose, read on.

So! Now that that’s out of the way, ladies… let’s dish. Because it’s about to get real up in this hizzy, and that can really mean only one thing: We’re talking about our periods. (See, guys? I warned you to get outta here!)

Ah yes, Aunt Flo, Dot, our Monthly Visitor, the Crimson Wave, or just our good, old-fashioned period. Whichever label you choose, I highly doubt any of you out there look forward to it on a monthly basis. I, in particular, dread it. And this is where we start to get personal (but, then again, it’s not exactly like I haven’t TMI’d you all many, many, many times before, eh?) because of the REASON I dread it. Which, actually, I’m sure you all can guess. But it’s because throughout my entire life I have had particularly heavy periods with outrageous, rhino-crippling cramps to go right alongside.

Oh, and did I mention that they lasted longer than the average bear period, too? Yep, my friends at school would be crying over their 4 – 5 day periods, and I’d still be clutching my abdomen with red fury at day 7 or 8. As if high school wasn’t terrible enough, right?

And it only made things worse that I would get my period every single month. Right on the dot. Like clockwork. Unlike my more irregular friends, who got the glorious reward of skipping their period every once in a while. (This is high school logic, mind you. I’m obviously very grateful that my body is so “normal” now… mostly.)

Anyway! So here you have high school Gretchen (well, middle-and-high-school Gretchen), who is stuck with a heavy flow on the reg, and all the joys that comes with that. Like… leaking. (I TOLD you we were getting personal!) I started out my period journey like most girls probably do — with pads. And no matter how huge and diaper-like and winged my overnight pads were, every single month, without fail, I would leak. Not so fun.

So when I finally made the switch to tampons, I naively thought, “At last! My days of leakage are over!” Well, guess who ended up having to be the girl wearing panty liners and pads WITH her tampons, because leakage was still such a big issue? Super comfortable, I tell you. Not to mention the fact that all those twirling-in-white-skirts-on-the-beach tampon commercials didn’t exactly make me feel better about myself. I mean, seriously. WHO WEARS WHITE BOTTOMS WHEN THEY’RE ON THEIR PERIOD?!

I felt like I was some kind of freak because of my non-white-wearability. Because my period was always so heavy, even tampons would fail me upon occasion. And because no, my period did not turn me into a delicate flower, it turned me into a psychotic ragebeast.

Unsurprisingly, when I lost some of my weight, my periods got a little better. BC helped too, of course, as most of you probably know it does. But there were many years of pseudo-adulthood prior to my weight loss, and I had to find a way to cope and not be constantly worrying about my nether-regions for multiple days a month.

Enter: U by Kotex.

I still think I remember one of the first commercials I ever saw featuring the tampons in the black box. It was just a cool-lookin’ chick, talking frankly to the camera about unrealistic and silly tampon commercials. It was a “Get out of my brain!” kind of moment for me, because that’s how I’d felt my entire life. I’m pretty sure I bought my first box that day, and never looked back. Which is why when I got the opportunity to partner up with U by Kotex through the Clever Girls Collective to tell all you folks about why they rock. Because they do. And you heard it here first.

“But, Gretchen!” you say, “Isn’t the only difference between U by Kotex and any other brand of tampon the color of the box? That’s just packaging and marketing. Why do you think it’s so great?”

“Good question!” I reply. “And you’re right in that I do think that the packaging is pretty sweet. I mean, so shoot me, I appreciate a cool-looking tampon box. It made that one time I asked Sean to pick up a box for me from CVS slightly more bearable for him (well, he still thinks it was horrible, but I think we all know it could’ve been SO much worse for him). But regardless of what the tampons look like, there’s no denying how well they work — for me, at least!”

The fact of the matter is, whether due to the fact that my period is slightly less horrifying now, or the fact that these tampons just really do work (or, perhaps most likely, a combination of both factors), I have yet to have a single, full-scale leak with these puppies. And I don’t even have to use the “Super Plus” kind to get it — I am fully spot-free just with the “Super” absorbency. The worst I’ve ever had is maybe a little bit of color from off of the string (have you run away screaming “CANNOT. HANDLE. THE. TMI!!!!” yet?). I do like the “Sleek” kind more than the “Click”, which are made for portability and hide-ability, but I can’t say I’m as big a fan of the applicator.

So, there you have it. My personal tampon preference, just in case you were interested, hahaha. And while yes, this is a sponsored post, I’m being totally honest when I say I’ve been exclusively using this brand for a long time — the fact that this opportunity came about was just gravy! If you’re interested in giving U by Kotex a try, they’ll even send you a free sample!

So lay it on me: have you ever tried this brand of lady-protection before? What do you think?

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I wrote this review while participating in a content series through Clever Girls Collective on behalf of U by Kotex, and received products to facilitate my post and compensation for my time to participate.